Through It All by the Hillsong Worship Team
You are forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with Your hand
And lead me in Your righteousness
And I look to You
And I wait on You
I will sing to You, Lord
A hymn of love
For Your faithfulness to me
I’m carried in everlasting arms
You’ll never let me go
Through it all
I’ve been trying to think of what to say at the one year anniversary of John Robert’s passing. Like most of my friends who have struggled to think of something helpful to say, I really have no words. The above song is particularly a blessing to me right now. No matter what seasons or struggles or heartaches we go through, God will carry us through them by His faithfulness. I have often thought through this past year that perhaps God was not faithful to John Robert. Maybe He wasn’t watching at a crucial moment. But I have come to believe that God was not only watching, but was with John Robert. As in my own missteps, God does not intervene and reverse our free will. I also believe that God received John Robert unto Himself and that there is no pain or struggle or heartache for him. If there are any tears, the Father above all fathers will wipe the tears from his eyes.
It is during anniversaries that we relive memories and remember things that happened. These are painful memories mixed in with sweet and happy ones from John Robert’s life. One of my memories is the immense wave of support that came our way from Christians and friends all over the country.We had good intentions of writing everyone who sent cards, flowers, memorials to Gulf Coast Bible Camp, and other forms of support and love. We didn’t ever do that. I am sorry for that and hope you’ll understand. How blessed we are to be a part of the Forsythe Family! We are so grateful for their loving support over these past twelve months.
One of the lessons we learned from our ordeal with Katrina is that the way out of discouragement is to help someone else. Through the encouragement of Royce and Carol Ogle we started a GriefShare group at Forsythe earlier this year. Starting in June we will offer a grief recovery group every Monday night. Because of writing about our loss on my blog, I have had private correspondence with others who have lost children. Recently published in the Christian Chronicle, my review of The Shack and Finding God at the Shack has brought about some correspondence from others who are hurting as well.
Nothing takes away the pain of our loss. It is permanent. However, like others who have borne this burden before us, we choose to live and to love. Without Abba’s presence in our lives, we would be unable to go on. On our darkest day, when nothing seems to matter, a short phrase comes to mind. Out here, hope remains. And the truth of those four words keeps us focused on the day when we will see John Robert once again.
Thank you, blog readers, for your many encouragements over this past year. I am truly grateful for our interaction here, and the way you have blessed me over and over.
Thanks for reading,